Perhaps even more importantly, paying attention to the other person's use of distance will tell you a great deal about their reactions and feelings towards you.
When you first approach an attractive stranger, having established an indication of mutual interest through eye contact,before moving any closer try to make eye contact again at about 4ft away.
At 4 ft, you are on the borderline between what are known as the "social zone" which is approximately from 4 to 12 ft and the "personal zone" which is approximately 18in to 4ft.
If you receive a positive response at 4ft, move to "arm's length" which is approximately about 2ft 6inches. If you approach much closer than this, especially within the 18in "personal/intimate zone" border, they may feel uncomfortable.
The "intimate zone" which is approximately less than 18inches is reserved for lovers, family and very close friends. If you are close enough to whisper and be heard, you are probably too close for comfort.
Especially in face-to-face encounters, these distance rules apply . When we are side by side with someone, it is easier to tolerate close distances.
This is because when you are alongside someone, it is easier just to turn away or avoid eye contact, which limits your involvement with the other person.
At the bar counter of a pub, you can therefore approach a bit closer than "arm's length" if you are alongside your target. Avoid "intrusive" body-language such as prolonged eye contact or touching.
The other person's discomfort wil show in their body language, if you have misjudged the appropriate distance. They may attempt to turn away or avert their gaze to avoid eye contact.
You may also see "barrier signals" such as folded or tightly crossed legs, or rubbing the neck with the elbow pointed towards you. If you see any of these signs, back off!
Finally, remember that different personalities may also react differently to your approach. Extroverts and anyone who feel at ease in company will be comfortable with closer distances than introverts and shy or nervous types.
Even the same person may vary from day to day, according to mood: when we are feeling depressed or irritable, we find close distances more uncomfortable.
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